Eliza's funny

I told Eliza tomorrow was the last of the year. She dramatically wailed and cried.

"What? Why are you sad??" I asked, clearly confused.

"Now it will NEVER be my birthday!" she sobbed.

"What? Yes, your birthday is still just 22 days away." I said, still confused.

"No! You said it's the LAST DAY!"

"OF THE YEAR YOU GOOSE, NOT ALL TIME!" And then I proceeded to laugh, while Eliza wiped her tears.

"Huh?" She asked.

And then I went on to explain that it was the last of the calendar year, and it will be 2019, and it will be January so her birthday will be even closer. Though I really had to laugh that her response to thinking it was the last day, ever, for all time, was that she would miss her 5th birthday.


And a few days earlier...

Eliza - "Mom, I think I have it all figured out. Grandma and Grandpa are daddy's mom and dad. And Nan and Pop are your mom and dad."

"Yep. That's right."

E - "But then who is Nan and Pop's mom and dad? JESUS??"

Magical nights

Not a great picture but it's all I've got to show you how much fun we had last night. This will be quick because I'm sitting in a "student-no-show" for VIPKID, but the student can show up at any time. So I will be brief, but I wanted to write something because otherwise this night will be soon forgotten. We loaded up the kids and a few friends in the back of Aaron's truck, as I sat in the cab with the babies and Aaron drove. The kids sang Christmas carols at the top of their lungs, and Nora sang along through the little window. Matthew danced in his car seat. We drove around and looked at lights in our neighborhood. Then we loaded up into the big van and got hot chocolate and went to Candy Cane Lane. There was a tour bus of retired people and the sidewalks were littered with little white haired old ladies. We had our windows down while we blasted the Christmas songs. And then I had the devious idea of putting on Grandma Got Run Over by A Reindeer. Which had Aaron in stitches. It was pretty funny. Then at the house with the candy canes the news was there filming. I had been cooking and baking all day and have been fighting a cold, so I was in really grubby clothes. Stained sweat pants, a pun t-shirt, and no shoes. I ran out to grab the candy canes because if we let all the kids out it would have been chaos. I am not sure how much the news filmed or what they will use but there is footage of me somewhere out there looking like a wreck, taking candy canes off a fence.

My 7 year old Nathan.

Link cake.
Fortnite shirt.
Playing Super Smash Bros on the Switch with his favorite people.

I think he had a pretty perfect birthday weekend.

And I wish I could keep him like this forever. Nathan is smart, kind, and just seriously a great kid. Doesn't hurt that he thinks the world of me too. I feel like we're on the cusp of change in our family and it terrifies me a little bit. So instead of being scared I'll just try to savor the moments and remember how quickly it all changes.

I was asking the kids if they liked my ideas for Christmas presents for Daddy. Nathan piped in, "Mom - whatever YOU get Daddy, he will love it.  If you tell him to. He will do anything you want! Especially at Christmas." Made my heart melt a little and just so glad that is his example of fatherhood and marriage. Hopefully though Aaron won't have to be told to like his Christmas presents.

Also, just an illustration of how much he loves me that I never want to forget.... There is an album called Broken Bride by Ludo. The whole thing is one continuous story about a man trying to go back in time to save his wife from dying in a car accident. It's sad, tragic and beautiful. To fully appreciate this story you need to just listen to it (at least the first and last song) My kids love it and we have the CD going almost every time we're in the car. One morning Nathan had a question about it. "How does the guy get back to his mom?" I start to explain and then pause, "...wait, Nathan, do you think this song is about his mom?"  Nathan, confidently, "Of course!"  *cue tears*

Finding joy in the little moments

I often feel like my life is complete chaos. And let's be real, most of the time it is. (I actually started this post two days ago, got interrupted and I'm just getting back to it now, at 8:30 on a Thursday.) Lately though, I've been able to find a lot of joy in the little things. Slowing down and taking a step back and just watching this incredible life unfold in front of me. Last night we had homemade pizza for dinner. The kids loved rolling out their dough and adding their own toppings. Everyone was fighting over the rolling pin, and notice who has it in the picture. Ms. Nora, Queen of Everything. 

Also, after dropping the kids off at school, on the way home we found this random pile of snow in someone's front yard. I couldn't NOT pull over and let my little girls get out and play for a bit. I hoped if anyone came out and was angry about it, their happiness and cuteness would win them over. But no one ever came out, and the girls had a great time.

I'm always thinking of the next thing I need to do. Or that I should be doing. Every once in a while it feels good to just let go of all of that, and just be with my kids. We've had a lot of fighting and yelling around here lately and I am certain a big part of it is from me, when I get mad about things not getting done and I yell, and it all trickles down. But we're a work in progress and I think we'll figure it out eventually.