Our time in Erie is coming to an end. We are shipping up and moving across the country in about 2 weeks. If you came to my house you would see, by lack of packed boxes, that I am in complete denial of that fact.
I have just loved living here. I am so grateful for the forces that brought us here. Two years ago I got to spend a week in NJ spending time with my family, including my Poppy, who I would never get to see in this life ever again. He was in 80's and every time we left NJ to go back to AZ, I would give him an extra big hug and would let myself think for a moment, this could be the last time I ever see him. I'd quickly brush that thought away, but the truth was a lot of the time we didn't know when we would be coming back and so it was true. I'd try tuck the memory of what I thought could be our last moment together somewhere special in my heart, until the next time I saw him. However, once we moved here, and the last time I saw him was when I was driving away to PA, not flying to AZ, I never dreamed I wouldn't see him again. I took no such mental picture, and sadly we didn't take nearly enough physical pictures that trip. Really, that whole week is a blur. I wish I could remember it more.
After only two weeks or so of living here we got the phone call that he had a stroke. We were on the road immediately. Only to realize that driving through the night with two small tired children was not a very good idea. My dad was begging to stay home and just come in the morning. I felt like I could talk and "say goodbye" to him from anywhere really. So we turned around and went home. And I sat on my porch and said my "goodbyes" from a distance. We found out the next morning, even if we did drive all night we would not have made it in time to say goodbye anyway. That was kind of a relief, as I was somewhat regretting not going. So we drove the next morning, and were there for the next several days. Those days are also a blur. We then drove home for a week.... and then drove back to spend a couple weeks with my Nanny while she grieved. Aaron dropped us off, and then picked us up a week, or maybe it was two weeks, later. Did I mention this drive is 450 miles? And that my kids were 2.5 and 9 months old?
Needless to say - the first year here was a rough one. Of course it had its good times, but overall it was very stressful. The next year was much better. I was more accustomed to Aaron's busy schedule, and on top of that no one died. Aaron's brother and his family also moved to PA last year and that has been so much fun. I really, really don't want this time to end! We have made such great friends that I will miss so much.
I have no idea where I'm going with this post. I just woke up and realized it's Monday -- a new week. And one of the last that we'll be here. I'm sad, and stressed, and excited for the next chapter in our lives to unfold. It's crazy how fast the last two years have gone by. And I'm sure the next two will fly by just as quick. I am so anxious to see where the next two years will bring us. It is somewhat unsettling to have no idea really where we will be once Aaron is finished with all of his schooling. Of course, we'll most likely be in AZ, but who knows where Heavenly Father will guide us, and where we will get a job, and all of that.
Guess we'll all have to stay tuned to find out.
I'm a terrible mover myself. It's so hard to leave, even if you know it's for the best! I'm looking forward to following your AZ adventures and I know it will be great, Heavenly Father will be right there for you guys, but you already knew that!
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