Feeling better.

I'm not quite as grumpy as I was for my last post. But still haven't found that happy place ... I think I will find it once I can close my eyes and not open them again for 6 hours. Srsly. It's been too long.

Or maybe when my house figures out how to clean itself. That might cheer me up a bit.

Or maybe I should just tell you about my horrific dental experience?

So I'm petrified of the dentist. Always have been. Don't know why. But even at the age of 8 my mom had to give me liquid Valium just to get me out the door. So now as an adult I avoid the place as much as possible. But the time came where I just can't avoid it anymore. I need to get my wisdom teeth out. So I had to start with a check up. Honestly just scheduling the appointment inflicted me with digestive issues. So you can imagine how actually driving myself and walking into the dentist's office effected me. I was pretty much a wreck. I told the receptionist about my anxiety. I told the hygienist. She spoke rather coldly and told me it was just a cleaning and there was no reason to be stressed about it. Not in a comforting way, but more in an annoyed kind of way. Anyway my legs were shaking the entire time, and I could not stop the tears from streaming out of the corners of my eyes and pooling in my ears (due to being reclined). It was also one of the most painful cleanings I've ever experienced. And she lectured me about flossing and regular dental visits pretty much the entire time. Then the dentist came in. I asked what he was going to be doing, and told him I had some anxiety. By this point I was no longer crying, but still shaking a little. He looked at me and told me flat out, "We can not handle your level of anxiety in this office. You're going to have to go a sedation dentist for your fillings. Good luck finding that with your insurance."  I was kind of flabbergasted. My level of anxiety?! Dude, you haven't seen anything. Talk to the three other dentists who have witnessed me vomiting, kicking, punching, and having full blown panic attacks. I honestly thought I had handled myself fairly well. Apparently not! And the good luck finding that with my insurance?! How rude. Yes we have crappy state health insurance while Aaron is in school. We are not moochers, or liars, or lazy scum of the earth type people, this guy was treating me like. Ugh, it was awful. Then he walked me up to the receptionist and told her not to schedule me for any future visits. I was so shocked! He never even talked to me about the cavities I apparently have, but did give me the referral for my wisdom teeth. So now I just need to find the courage to do that. Someone tell me how it's not so bad to get them out. Tell me how it's relaxing.Or something, anything! They have been getting infected a lot lately, and I know they need to come out. But living with a lifetime of infection honestly sounds better than having someone dig four teeth out of my skull.

... this didn't help with my grumpiness. Oohh well. Oh by the way I lost another EL BEE so I'm down 15. I'm really excited, even though I'm not even close to winning the contest.